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Yo mama is so fat that she looks like she`s smuggling a Volkswagon!

Yo mama is so fat that people jog around her for exercise.

Yo mama is so stupid that she was born on Independence Day and can`t remember her birthday.

Yo mama is so fat that she eats Wheat Thicks.

Yo mama is so old that she planted the first tree at Central Park.

Yo mama`s teeth are so yellow that when she smiles everyone sings We`re Walking on Sunshine.

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet!

Yo mama is so ugly that she makes blind children cry.

Yo mama is so stupid that if you gave her a penny for her thoughts, you`d get change.

Yo mama is so stupid that she locked her keys inside a motorcycle.

Yo mama is so ugly that she put the Boogie Man out of business!

Yo mama is so ugly that she climbed the ugly ladder and didn`t miss a step.

Yo mama is so stupid that she once attempted to commit suicide by jumping off a curb.

Yo mama is so fat that her blood type is Ragu.

Yo mama is so stupid that I saw her jumping up and down, asked what she was doing, and she said she drank a bottle of medicine and forgot to shake it.

Yo mama is so stupid that she ordered a cheese burger from McDonald`s and said Hold the cheese.

Yo mama is like Humpty Dumpty - First she gets humped, then she gets dumped.

Yo mama`s like a postage stamp, you lick her, stick her, then send her away.

It took yo mama 10 tries to get her drivers license - she couldn`t get used to the front seat!

Yo mama is so fat that she sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington`s nose.